I can start with my story

I really believe that gaining access to our voice and having the ability to tell our story not only empowers us to heal, it takes away ALL the power from the past.

I am Toni Schafer

“My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.” – Maya Angelou

I understand how something from your childhood can haunt you in the most intimate moments. I spent the beginning of my marriage trying to push past the fear that was unfounded and controlled a big part of my relationship. The person who I trusted more than anyone I had ever met in my life, could not have all of me. It was not possible.

The hardest part for me, I could never fully explain to him why. My body would not allow me to enjoy his gentle caress or sometimes, even being too close was a trigger that my words could not express. I hated that I was unable to connect with this loving man.

I knew that I was robbed.

I knew that he was robbed. Finally, 8 years into our marriage, I decided to take a leap. I began taking a sex class with other local women and I realized how bad things had really become. I could not participate in the homework, I did not enjoy the same things these women discussed. I began to have some real and intimate conversations with my husband. For the first time, I heard him express how this really affected him.  It broke my heart to understand the impact those summers decades ago were playing in my daily life now.

It wasn’t until I began to explore the option of  NOT being triggered that I realized

freedom really could be mine.

I am here to encourage you to start your healing journey NOW. Do not put this off. Healing is here, it is real.

You can restore what was once robbed from you.

Join this journey

You can fast track your healing by joining a community of people who will understand and listen. This is that place.